These are some of the things that irritate me:
a) car alarms
b) things that wake me before dawn
c) car alarms that wake me before dawn
d) not-car-alarms that wake me before dawn.
Scene 1, Sunday morning, way too bleeping early:
zzzzzzzzzzzz[car-alarm-noise outside]zzz *snort* wha? huh? oh...[sleepily]...it's a stupid car alarm.
[wanting to go back to sleep, but car alarm continues]
stupid car alarm! they don't work! it's always just accidentally set off, so no one ever looks. car alarms should be [insert nasty thought here].
[car alarm continues]
*curses* [grab glasses, go to window to see if I can spot the car... perhaps to report the idiot to the front office.]
[can't see any car obviously making noise]
[car drives calmly past, brain is still half-alseep] ...uh, white guy, blue cap. if I hear of a car stolen, it was a white guy with a blue cap. can I identify him? no... I live too far from the street to make out details. car colour? no idea. yeah, I'd make a *great* witness.
[meanwhile, car alarm noise has stopped. go back to sleep.]
Scene 2, Monday morning, 5:50am:
zzzzzzzzzzzz[car-alarm-noise outside]zzz *snort* wha? huh? oh...[sleepily]...it's a stupid car alarm. *again*.
[wanting to go back to sleep, but car alarm continues]
stupid car alarm! they don't work! it's always just accidentally set off, so no one ever looks. car alarms should be [insert nasty thought here].
[car alarm continues]
*curses* [grab glasses, go to window to see if I can spot the car... perhaps to report the idiot to the front office.]
[car alarm noise moves off]
[can't see any car obviously making noise]
[notice faint light in the east]
[attempt to go back to sleep]
*hungry*
[trying to sleep]
*hungry*
[trying to sleep]
*hungry*
[trying to sleep]
*hungry*
[trying to sleep]
*hungry*
[go to kitchen to find something to shut stomach up]
[car alarm noise coming from back yard... where there are *no* cars]
wha????
[brain starts working and makes connections]
...it's a mocking bird? a mocking bird has decided that my yard is it's territory? and it will mark it by making car-alarm noises? every morning?!? before DAWN????????
[insert not-so-nice thoughts.]
[munch handful of dry cereal]
[go back to bed]
Scene 3, Tuesday morning, way too bleeping early:
[to be written]
3 comments:
Wow...I've heard of birds imitating mobile phone ringtones, but not car alarms. I hope the mockingbird decides to settle elsewhere.
Sadly, I think the mocking bird has it's heart set on my place. Hopefully it'll stop making noise once this part of mating season is over.
I've heard of them imitating everything, including rusty hinges. It was a weird noise for a car alarm, so maybe it started off as something else. A car alarm was mostly the only thing I could think of it being.
Those things are some of the most useless things around. Too many people even have them set up to where they make noise when people lock and unlock their cars. What's the purpose of that? A lot of people these days have it set to where their headlights and tail-lights simply flash a couple of times and their keychains might make a small buzz. So why doesn't the rest of the population get the message that this is possible as well!?!
Mockingbirds are pretty neat. Why not catch this one and put him in a room with some kind of pleasant music such as Willie Nelson, Anne Murray, or The Carpenters going on and re-train him! LOL
Cheers!
AJ :-)
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